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News & events for Tuesday, February 9

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Local Bands:

Lazer

Lazer 

Based in Dallas, TX

http://www.lazertheband.com


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  • Anonymous

pugeez, says:

I love this band. I love their crow. I love their speedo's.

Anonymous

4 years ago
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ch0, says:

Interesting. This profile looks just odd enough to pique my interest and prompt a tune download. I'll be back...

Anonymous

4 years ago
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pugeez, says:

Lazer is so cool and lekker. I wish they remove the 4th veil of banality that suffocates the Portland music scene and visit us. Lazer we have plenty of speedo and kraut and bird food for crow.

Anonymous

3 years, 11 months ago
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pugeez, says:

Laver u r sexy and so luscious,

I go to bed every night with Hammel speedo tucked neatly under my pillow. I stole it by distracting him-- I posed as mad customer who found a pube in his kraut while my weiner dog, ella worthington, snatched the "goods" out of his puma duffle bag.

I so lucky to love Lazer and have a wonderful weiner dog.

Anonymous

3 years, 11 months ago
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pugeez, says:

Dear Lazer,

I ate Chuckie Cheese yesterday and was driving to LA. I thought I was safe but unfortunately when I squeeze my air biscuit a little apple butter came along with it. But to my surpise and the lady's too, when I took my speedo off that night after a fun time of jigging at the Viper Room there it was...in the encrusted "apple butter" a profile of Keinhorst right in the crotch of the speedo. I must be you number one fan. Lazer you rock steady.

p

Anonymous

3 years, 11 months ago
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Lazer, says:

Thankz 4 sharing. Make your friendz download Let Me Dance You from iTunes so we can come do the show in L.A.

Anonymous

3 years, 11 months ago
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pugeez, says:

Dear Lazer,

I am in Philadelphia. It must be the gayest city in the world. It is so gay that the women look like men. But your song, "dance for racism" has made me sympathetic to what I cannot understand. U'zzz da best, Lazer.

Anonymous

3 years, 10 months ago
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rellerell, says:

lol, you guys are hilarious. Interesting website

Anonymous

3 years, 10 months ago
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pugeez, says:

Dear Lazer,

I just listened to your Maverick tune. It was so inspiring, that I laced up my chuckie's and head to the Wallace Park (that's where AC Green and Bill "get him off HD" Walton street balled it back in the day) to get me game on. With only wearing on chuckies and a speedo and having your B-Ball anthem in my brian I gained the respect of my fellow ballers and a few of the ladies sunning themselves in the park with my skills and physique. You is the bomb Lazer come to Portland and Play at the DougFir.

Pugeez

PS it would be easier to write a song about the Blazers since Blazer rhythm with Lazer. But they suck as equally as you are supreme

Anonymous

3 years, 10 months ago
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Skylar, says:

Laz, it's sky. Congrats on all of your success, now tell people we exist!

Anonymous

3 years, 10 months ago
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pugeez, says:

Dear Lazer,

Its me again, your number one fan west of the Serrias. My travels have been abundant these last few months. And everywhere I go I spread the word of Lazer and a few legs of women overcome by the euphonous twinklings of yous musik. Call me Johnny Appleseed or Wilt Chamberlin (readers choice- word, power to the people) I am spreading the word of Lazer, like the Dutch do peanutkass. Please come to Portland and spin your talents at da Doug Fir soon.

Anonymous

3 years, 8 months ago
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What do you think?

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Band History

Immortalized by legions of adoring fans around the world, it may be hard to believe that there was a time when the trio now known as Lazër were just three children in a Rhineland metal factory, laboring long hours in poor conditions for slave wages. However, this harrowing experience created a lasting bond between Briso, Hammel and Keinhorst; one which would help them persevere and eventually form the techno/hip-hop hybrid that has since topped music charts across the globe.

However, in typical rock-n-roll fashion, success has not come without a price. Shortly before departing Rhineland for America, a drug-related accident claimed the life of Keinhorst, leaving Briso and Hammel reeling and the future of the group in limbo. After deciding to continue as a duo, Lazër collaborated with musicians like King David and Ice von Shredula in hopes of filling some of the void their third member's passing left.

Information submitted by the band

Members

Former Members

Albums

Influences

Kraftwerk, Timbalands, Iggy Pop Stooges, Triphammer and so many mores.

Sound Description

Kraftwerk & Spinal Tap had a baby and taught it to rap.

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