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Local Band:

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Based in Dallas, TX
http://www.lazertheband.com/


LAZER

LAZER

Sound Description:

Kraftwerk & Spinal Tap had a baby and taught it to rap.

Recommended if you like:

Sexy dancing, danger, Speedos, getting crunk




Upcoming Shows

No upcoming shows.

View past local shows



Band History

Very little is known about the group often referred to as "The World'z Most Danger Group in the World." Emerging from out of nowhere in 2005, LAZËR took the world by storm with their debut LP Let Me Dance You, only to disappear again two years later.

Rumors of drug abuse and intra-band conflict surrounded the recording of the band's second album, Twatobahn. Briso's fascination with reptile training and Hammel's "Metal Legz" experiment were purportedly the main culprits behind LAZËR's extended absence.

However, fully recharged and backed by a line-up of old allies and recent recruits, it seems LAZËR is once again poised to rule the international pop charts while making people look at their immense crotches. The era of Twatobahn is upon us.

Information submitted by the band

Sound Description

Kraftwerk & Spinal Tap had a baby and taught it to rap.

Influences

Knivez and stabbing weaponz

Albums by this artist

Let Me Dance You album cover Let Me Dance You Released 2005
Twatobahn album cover Twatobahn Released 2010


pugeez, anonymous:

I love this band. I love their crow. I love their speedo's.

6 years, 3 months ago
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ch0, anonymous:

Interesting. This profile looks just odd enough to pique my interest and prompt a tune download. I'll be back...

6 years, 3 months ago
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pugeez, anonymous:

Lazer is so cool and lekker. I wish they remove the 4th veil of banality that suffocates the Portland music scene and visit us. Lazer we have plenty of speedo and kraut and bird food for crow.

6 years, 3 months ago
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pugeez, anonymous:

Laver u r sexy and so luscious,

I go to bed every night with Hammel speedo tucked neatly under my pillow. I stole it by distracting him-- I posed as mad customer who found a pube in his kraut while my weiner dog, ella worthington, snatched the "goods" out of his puma duffle bag.

I so lucky to love Lazer and have a wonderful weiner dog.

6 years, 2 months ago
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pugeez, anonymous:

Dear Lazer,

I ate Chuckie Cheese yesterday and was driving to LA. I thought I was safe but unfortunately when I squeeze my air biscuit a little apple butter came along with it. But to my surpise and the lady's too, when I took my speedo off that night after a fun time of jigging at the Viper Room there it was...in the encrusted "apple butter" a profile of Keinhorst right in the crotch of the speedo. I must be you number one fan. Lazer you rock steady.

p

6 years, 2 months ago
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LAZËR, anonymous:

Thankz 4 sharing. Make your friendz download Let Me Dance You from iTunes so we can come do the show in L.A.

6 years, 2 months ago
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pugeez, anonymous:

Dear Lazer,

I am in Philadelphia. It must be the gayest city in the world. It is so gay that the women look like men. But your song, "dance for racism" has made me sympathetic to what I cannot understand. U'zzz da best, Lazer.

6 years, 1 month ago
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rellerell, anonymous:

lol, you guys are hilarious. Interesting website

6 years, 1 month ago
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pugeez, anonymous:

Dear Lazer,

I just listened to your Maverick tune. It was so inspiring, that I laced up my chuckie's and head to the Wallace Park (that's where AC Green and Bill "get him off HD" Walton street balled it back in the day) to get me game on. With only wearing on chuckies and a speedo and having your B-Ball anthem in my brian I gained the respect of my fellow ballers and a few of the ladies sunning themselves in the park with my skills and physique. You is the bomb Lazer come to Portland and Play at the DougFir.

Pugeez

PS it would be easier to write a song about the Blazers since Blazer rhythm with Lazer. But they suck as equally as you are supreme

6 years, 1 month ago
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Skylar, anonymous:

Laz, it's sky. Congrats on all of your success, now tell people we exist!

6 years, 1 month ago
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pugeez, anonymous:

Dear Lazer,

Its me again, your number one fan west of the Serrias. My travels have been abundant these last few months. And everywhere I go I spread the word of Lazer and a few legs of women overcome by the euphonous twinklings of yous musik. Call me Johnny Appleseed or Wilt Chamberlin (readers choice- word, power to the people) I am spreading the word of Lazer, like the Dutch do peanutkass. Please come to Portland and spin your talents at da Doug Fir soon.

5 years, 11 months ago
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