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Steel wool over mine eyes

Posted By Mike Orren in The One That's Not About Music on March 9, 2006

Contrary to the smooth rock-star image you may have of this Little Business and our hobnobbing with the musicati, we often have pretty long, intense, stressful days. Today was one of them, although not a particular standout on that front.

So, realizing I needed gas on the way home, I stopped at our friendly neighborhood Racetrac for twelve gallons of regular unleaded and a twelvepack of brew.

Since we're not exactly rolling in dough these days, I went in looking for the cheapest non-Beast twelvepack I could find. Wedged in among the premium beers was something I hadn't seen before: Steel Reserve.

I was skeptical. But, this comforting logo reassured me.

Hmm. Fort Worth. I like Fort Worth. I trust things from Fort Worth. Fort Worth is my friend.

So I come home, start playing with the dogs and gently sip down three Steel Reserves over the next seven minutes. No biggie. Wasn't the tastiest beer ever, but any port in a long day, eh?

Suddenly, I realize that I am feeling far tipsier than one should after hosing down 36 oz. of Fort Worth beer in a tenth of an hour.

I examine the can closely. Very closely. Because the type isn't as, shall we say, sans serif as it originally was.

Then, I saw the two tricks to which I had succumbed.

#1: 8.1% alcohol by volume.

The Maredsous of malt liquor. That's what I had bought. And with an extra .1% as a kick in the pants.

#2:

Fort Worth my Heinie.

Fortunately, April had left me a heaping pot of brunswick stew and a loaf of bread to combat those Wisconsin wiles. Some three hours later, I've regained equilibrium.

But I shan't be fooled again.

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  • Anonymous

Blair Lovern, says:

Can you believe a can of beer has a MySpace page? (Steel Reserve 211 has 109 friends.)

They say this:

"About me: Steel Reserve is slow brewed in limited batches, using only the finest maleted barley & selected hops. We believe this to be among the very best beers in the world. Slow brewed in Fort Worth, TX for exceptionally smooth flavor."

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?...

I also read this elsewhere: "Four pack of cans was $1.99. Worth every penny, if you pour out the last 3 after the first makes you sick."

http://beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/...

ScottChaffin, says:

Three in seven?!? Good gravy, that's studly. That's 'Keystone Lights after a day of busting brush' territory. What makes it supremely studly is you didn't even recognize it as malt liquor and had to check the label.

I salute you, sir.

Anonymous

4 years ago
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Jesse Hughey, says:

Awesome. That stuff tastes like a Mickey's-and-rubbing-alcohol boilermaker, but it has its uses. Like when you want to get your buzz on fast and you're too broke to buy liquor but too proud to chug mouthwash. Didn't know it came by the 12-pack.

ch0, says:

LMAO!!! I learned my lesson about Steel Reserve too. It is no joke.

Anonymous

4 years ago
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Cindy Chaffin, says:

Jesse me thinks we need to party together my friend!

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4 years ago
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Jesse Hughey, says:

Cindy, I was sorry I missed you last night, but I left a can on the office doorway for you or whoever gets it first. Lone Star and Shiner can duke it out over which is the official beer of Metroplex music, but I think SR 211 should be the official malt liquor.

Staff

3 years, 12 months ago
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Cindy Chaffin, says:

Well Jesse, beer in the office doorway is a really good incentive to work out of the office more often!

Jesse is my new bestest friend.

Verified

3 years, 12 months ago
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Mike Orren, says:

Hey Jesse!

I was so excited about the Steel Reserve that I drank it warm.

I bet you're having a good day with the other 11 :)

Staff

3 years, 12 months ago
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Jesse Hughey, says:

After last night, there are fewer than 11. But I saved some to enjoy before the Rubber Gloves show tonight. Drinking the 211 warm during the day takes it to the next level, though. Much respect, Mike.

Staff

3 years, 12 months ago
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