Zayra Alvarez performs “You Really Got Me” by The Kinks

by Caroline North

Last night’s episode of Rock Star: Supernova only affirmed what I had suspected since watching its predecessor, Rock Star: INXS. The folks over at CBS are relying on a formula that amounts to 10% talent and 90% gimmick. Which isn’t surprising considering that the latest is a show based on the allure of Tommy Lee’s celebrity.

A group of experienced musicians competing for a shot at being a part of a bigger, better band. It’s a nice idea. But if they’re experienced, doesn’t that mean that they should also be talented? The performances last night said one thing, and one thing only: dress the part, and you’re the person. It seems that anyone who puts on some black pants, a spiked belt, and combs their hair over their face is now considered a punk rocker.

As was the case with virtually all of the guys, who — as Simon Cowell would say — did karaoke versions of songs like “Take Me Out” by Franz Ferdinand and The Stones’ “Jumpin’ Jack Flash.” In my opinion, the best male performance was given by Phil Ritchie, who sang "If You Could Only See" by Tonic. Thankfully, he could actually sing. The girls proved to be a slightly more solid group. Storm Large and Dana Andrews did respectable versions of "Surrender" and "Born To Be Wild."

I’d like to focus for a moment on Zayra Alvarez, as she’s one of our very own (Dallas via Puerto Rico). That Zayra has stage presence is undeniable, but I was unimpressed by her rendition of The Kink’s "You Really Got Me." Because the lyrics are pretty repetitive, it requires some ingenuity to keep an audience entertained. And unfortunately for Zayra, her prancing around in a tight black outfit isn’t enough. However, her performance wasn’t anywhere near the worst of the night, so I’d say she can sleep soundly. Plus, she’s one of few girls in the competition who seems feisty enough to hold her own amongst Tommy Lee, Gilby Clarke and Jason Newsted. Ex: When Gilby asked Zayla if she owned any record that he, Tommy or Jason had been on, she retorted that she’d “heard of their music,” but that she was in diapers at the time it was released. Zayra: 1, Rockers-in-denial: 0.

At the second episode mark, Rock Star: Supernova seems to be another reality TV disappointment. It’s striving to be an edgier, more underground version of American Idol, but it has all the grit of a never-ending Clear Channel playlist.

One final note: what’s with re-arranging all of the classics? I, for one, think that what was done to the work of Johnny Cash last night should be illegal (although Dave Navarro seemed to love it). Isn’t the point of deeming something a classic that it doesn’t have to be tinkered with or modernized to remain relevant?

• Staff
• Verified User
• Anonymous