First graders at Irving’s Keyes Elementary School create giant bug monster that destroys the planet

by Chad Jones

As part of recent Earth Day activities to emphasize recycling, first grade teachers at Keyes Elementary School created a “bottle bug” using more than 900 recycled laundry bottles.

Most of bottles were collected from Irving homes and laundromats.

Suddenly, a government truck carrying tons of radioactive chemicals—distracted by the presence of such a giant plastic caterpillar—swerved into on-coming traffic on Brittain Road and then barreled into the sculpture and school, wherein the intense radiation combined with the melted plastic to create a creature of infinite hellaciousness. Desecration ensued. Nothing will curb its thirst for first-grade flesh.