Friday, May 9, 2008

Movie review: The Babysitters

"Mr. Waterston, you've got a lovely daughter..."

By John P. Meyer

The Babysitters

Shirley Lyner is a typical high school teen-she worries about her grades and the SAT's; she wonders if her best friend's step-brother likes her, she baby-sits a few nights to make some extra cash. Shirley even has a little crush on one of her new clients; the dad, Mr. Beltran, makes her blush when he comes to pick her up. But, when Mr. Beltran kisses Shirley before taking her home, Shirley kisses back. And the extra big tip Mr. Beltran gives Shirley on top of her babysitting fee feels less like a guilty payoff and more like a little of surge of electricity. So when Mr. Beltran's friend wants to know if Shirley has any friends who can also "baby-sit", Shirley sees a way she can make a quick twenty percent. Before long, Shirley realizes, the more girls she has "babysitting", the bigger her college fund.

Source: Cinema Source

• Showtimes and more on The Babysitters

As a group, middle aged married men appear to have a thing (and by "thing" I mean full-on boner) for dewy, post-pubescent high school girls and will pay dearly (on several levels) to satisfy their Lolita-flavored longings. At least, that is the premise behind The Babysitters, a new film written and directed by David Ross (The Woods) and showcasing the acting talents of Sam Waterston progeny Katherine Waterston.

For someone with a conscience (speaking theoretically), watching this played-straight relationship drama can be a bit uncomfortable. I mean, we are talking about older guys having sex with minors. And about prostitution. And adultery. All portrayed in unflinching R-rated detail. (I've seen the movie characterized as a dark comedy on other websites, but frankly I'm not getting the joke.)

Starring (and co-produced by) the talented John Leguizamo as happily (though not thrillingly) married Michael Beltran - and backed by Sex and the City gal pal Cynthia Nixon (as Michael's somewhat oblivious wife, Gail) - the movie clearly had some middleweight development muscle behind it. Due to its touchy subject matter, though, its distribution will perforce be limited to art house cinemas (thus its exclusive booking at the Inwood here in Dallas).

Story-wise, we're looking at a clique of high school girls facing the approaching prospect of college and the imminent prospect of SATs. At the fringe of this social network is Shirley (Ms. Waterston, looking all of 17 - presumably she is older). Shirley, we come to find from her mannerisms, is something of an obsessive compulsive: when noshing at the diner, she's compelled to line up the condiments in neatly-arranged ranks on the counter in front of her.

(Should I kiss her, or just drop her off? Which 'a deeze?)

When Shirley takes a baby sitting assignment for Mr. Beltran, a friend of her father's, we're given to observe a good deal of unspoken sexual tension passing between them in their glances. Thus it's no big surprise when, in the course of driving Shirley home from her assignment looking after his kids, Beltran allows their attraction to progress to the physical. He gives Shirley a nice tip for her services and motors back to the house.

On the occasion of their next tryst (after another babysitting job) the pattern is repeated. Shirley bundles up her stack of twenties with a rubber band and prints across the face of the top bill with a Sharpie: "Trouble." (The printing is neat; the letters are evenly spaced.)

From a series of casual (paid) encounters with a man whose company she enjoys, Shirley ramps up the enterprise. First she enlists the aid of her close friend Melissa (Lauren Birkell) and then - as their babysitting business booms beyond their ability to handle all the jobs (ahem) - others among their group of friends are inducted into the service, including the predatory Nadine (Halley Wegryn Gross) and Nadine's virginal but anxious-to-fit-in sister, Brenda (Louisa Krause).

Katherine Waterston as Shirley: young enterpriser

And here's where I presume the black comedy references come into play, because there's so much money to be made (at $200 a pop - then $300, once the clients get a taste) that soon the girls are flaunting their prosperity by displaying copious bling in the school hallways and handing out embossed business cards advertising their services ("The Babysitters"). Neighborhood dads are buying into it big-time, while neighborhood moms seem to have other things on their minds.

As the underage hooker house calls continue, Trouble (with a capital "T") does eventually rear its head - first in the form of inter-agency rivalry (leading to an after-hours trashing of the school by a vindictive Shirley, who wants to send a clear message that she's the one in charge of this lucrative enterprise), and then stemming from a weekend of unfettered debauchery at the hunting cabin owned by one of the middle-aged clients. During this overnighter a half-dozen johns and the entire stable of Shirley's girls engage in wanton sex while popping pills of indeterminate origin.

Who says you can't get enough of a good thing? Following this episode (in which at least one high schooler has a really bad trip and another is nearly raped), the gravitational center of Shirley's organization begins to spin out of control, and the halcyon nights of pay-for-underage-play draw to an abrupt and confrontational close.

"You made HOW MUCH last night?"

While providing plenty of food for thought (has there actually ever been an enterprise like this? what sort of God-fearing, law-abiding married man would stoop to participate in such a thing? what would be the long-term psychological effects on the girls? do they take MasterCard?), the primary thing served up by this flick is salaciousness.

Katherine Waterston is a fine and talented young actress. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I wish she'd managed to keep her shirt on in this one.

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