Theater review: The Hartburn Hotel

by Lyle Huchton of John Garcia's The Column

Hartburn Hotel succeeds with its performances, but has some script and timing issues.

"Are you a nice reviewer or a mean reviewer?" the Box Office Lady asked me when I went to pick up my tickets. With a flip of my Hermie the Elf bangs and a smile, I replied, "Why, a nice one." Then I turned and gave out a cackle that would make Margaret Hamilton's hair curl and disappeared in a puff of green smoke.

A bit melodramatic, you say? Why of course it is, I am about to visit The Hartburn Hotel.

The Hartburn Hotel by Whitney Ryan Garrity is currently being performed at The McKinney Performing Arts Center. The melodrama is produced by McKinney Repertory Theatre; The space is in the Courtroom Theater.

The setting for this gripping melodrama is Calamity Gulch, The Old West, USA. We find the Ma and Pa Culpepper are on the verge (once again) of losing The Last Chance Inn. In walks Sahara Hartburn waving stacks of cash to help save them. But do not be fooled by her pretty exterior, she's a wolf in sheep's clothing, and nothing good is to come from her charity, or lack thereof. "Calamity" ensues. Men start dressing like women, identities are exposed, popcorn is flung far and wide, and the good prevail with the help of a few swigs of sarsaparilla.

What I like about melodramas are the broad adjectives used to describe the characters. Scheming, pretty, dumb, trusty are just a few that are associated with The Hartburn Hotel.

The challenge for the actor is to make sure to keep these adjectives alive for their audience. This mostly young and inexperienced cast makes a good go at it on hanging onto these adjectives.

Polly Sincere, played with such earnest conviction by Mackenzie Schulien, is the pretty new schoolteacher in Calamity Gulch. Giving her a run for her money is the scheming Sahara Hartburn. (Melissa Johnson) She wins the prize as "Most Popcorn Showered Upon". After one typhoon, she quipped to the audience, "All that and you can get none in my mouth?" Daniel Tiner is Rod, her dumb "assistant", a bobble headed cowboy with a habit of running into doors. And the adorable Mohini Lal is Princess Prettyfoot, Calamity Gulch's trusty Deputy.

Performances aside, most of the problems I had were with the script. Particularly in the second act when Sahara recaps all the action that has transpired until then, (a total loss of 15 minutes) and a chase sequence that goes nowhere. A little creative license in the form of a scissor would have solved both those problems.

There were also some timing issues with scene changes and audience reactions. This was the opening night performance so a few invited dress rehearsals or previews would have helped the cast adjust to the booing and cheering. I also did not see much need for the magic act during intermission. Take a rest cast and allow the audience to take their break.

The Courtroom Theater was the perfect location for this drama. I felt that it could have been used to its full potential if it were dressed as an old theater with foot lights and a placard/easel that helped progress the action. The costume design, by Barbara Alkofer, reminded me of the garments worn in the "old-time" photographs you can take at theme and amusement parks. They were good enough to show time and place, but did not say much for the characters.

So get out of the heat and take a visit to The Hartburn Hotel to boo, hiss, cheer, and throw lots of corn. You can forget your sunscreen and antacid.