Most print publications have experts picking NFL games every week: Pegasus News, however, is different, in that we have near-flawless methodology in picking teams that will actually win. Our panel of perfect prognosticators -- Todd Maternowski and Mike Bullock -- will bring the pain each and every week.
As an added bonus, we have included three competing methodologies. The first is the return of "Mascot War," in which we discuss which team's actual moniker would win in a pitched battle to the death in the wild. Besides being easily the most controversial aspect of this feature, it will probably also be a constant source of embarrassment as our picks are routinely shown up.
Our twelve-man team of graphic artists worked day and night for weeks to come up with this state-of-the-art chart
The second and third methodologies are perhaps equally arcane and mysterious to the average NFL fan. There is the "Occult Pick," in which our experts use the forbidden art of divination to predict each week's winner; and "Fashion War," in which Todd's wife selects each victor based on the relative superiority of each team's uniforms.
Most of these picks need no explanation: however, our panel has provided some commentary (footnotes and indexing to follow) for certain especially difficult-to-pick games.
Mike B: 49er Versus Cardinal -- This week's match up between the 49er and the Cardinal of Arizona will be a bloodbath. The 49er can throw all the explosives they want; however, the Cardinal can outmaneuver any slingshot, tin pan, or pick. This week as the 49ers pack their mules and head back into the desert, the Cardinal will be sharpening its talons and waiting for the prey to enter it's territory. Once the 49er gets too weak, the Cardinal will attack the 49er, hiding themselves in the light of the sun, clawing the flesh, and ripping the eyeballs out of the tired and weak victim. Cardinal over 49er
Todd M: Lion Versus Saint -- Ah, the classic battle of Deadly Fang versus Divine Favor, Mane versus Halo, Pride versus Humility. The ancient Romans would constantly amuse themselves between orgies with this very mascot battle, pitting the kings of the jungle against those meek enough to inherit the earth. Can the Saint muster enough bloodlust to overcome their propensity to turn the other cheek? Or will the Lion use its innate stealth and pouncing abilities to catch the speaking-in-tongues-tied Saint while he's deep in prayer? This week, the Lion lays down with the lamb ... and devours its lifeless carcass. Lion over Saint
