Thursday, March 22, 2012
Thursday Morning Cupcheck - Better Know a Star: Loui Eriksson
This week, we hit on a few fun facts about the Swedish Condor.
Good morning, hockey fans! Last week we explained why your favorite team will not make the playoffs, using simplistic words we knew even Flyers fans could read. This week, we're digging deep to divulge delicate dinformation about the one Dallas Star no one seems to know anything about: the enigmatic Loui Eriksson.
Who is this half-man, half-legend, top secret Swedish Centaur? Join us as we scour the back alleys of Wikipedia for answers.
Name: Loui Eriksson
Acceptable Nicknames: Loui Loui, The Swedish Condor, Loui the Red, The Viper of Stockholm, The Baltic Nightmare, The Ninja of Frolundja
Unacceptable Nicknames: Sweedy
Born in: Gothenborg
Is that...? The most metal-sounding city of all time? Yes.
Weight: 193 pounds
Wingspan: 15 feet
Defining Moment as a Dallas Star: Probably this sick, sick shorthanded game-changing goal.
Nicest Comparison: Jere Lehtinen
Meanest Comparison: Whichever one of the Sedin twins that sucks
Strengths: Skating ability, speed, puck patience, vision, awareness, sniper shot, defensive reliability
Weaknesses: A Møøse once bit his sister
Better Than Brad Richards in 2011-12?: Yes
Who Wants Him: Women, NHL GMs
Who Wants to Be Him: Men
Preferred DnD Character: Paladin
Least Similar Game of Thrones Character: Theon Greyjoy
Looks Eerily Similar To: Alexander Skarsgård
Looks Nothing Like: Tyler Perry's Madea
Most Appropriate Music Video: This one works on many levels.
Career Goals: Multiple Stanley Cups and Olympic Gold Medals, maybe a single mention from at least one East Coast hockey media outlet per season
Worst Fear: Taking a Finnish algebra test in his underwear
Things He Does Better Than You: Hockey, Life
If He Was a Beer, He'd Be: Oppigårds Drakens DIPA
Alternate Universe Career: Male model, Beowulf
See more stories in:
- Thursday Morning Cupcheck - Grading the 2013 Dallas Stars
- Thursday Morning Cupcheck - Exploding the Myth of Talent
- Thursday Morning Cupcheck - Alas, Poor Michael Ryder, We Hardly Knew Ye
- Thursday Morning Cupcheck - Top 5 Reasons the Dallas Stars Will/Won't Make the Playoffs
- Thursday Morning Cupcheck - A Look Back at the 2011-12 Dallas Stars