twisteddog

• 1 year, 4 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas Metroplex citizens come together to save Jenny the African elephant

  Sell the elephant to Fearing's.

• 1 year, 4 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  A female Maltipoo is lost in Plano

  For a private joke to work, the people involved should know each other. I don't know David from anybody. The thing that I find most disturbing is that staff roots around in my profile/information and changes things. I've never "verified" my profile, because I don't trust people with my information. And this just confirms my suspicions. I hope there hasn't been some sort of pegasus privacy policy change.

• 1 year, 4 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  A female Maltipoo is lost in Plano

  I mostly read the site on RSS, so I'm lucky I saw this.
  

  I'm all for jokes, of course, but what's more interesting to me is that a site that boasts that it's community-oriented and user-dependent lets its staff enact little acts of private vengance on its readers/contributors.

• 1 year, 4 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  A female Maltipoo is lost in Plano

  Wow... Now when I log on to pegasus news, all I see are photos of David Goudin. I guess somebody didn't like a comment I made. I didn't think that's how Pegasus News worked.

  
  

  
  

  

• 1 year, 4 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  New product Wednesday, at Dallas-area stores: Blue Bell summer flavors ice cream

  I've never taken the Gouldins seriously, just based on the pictures.

• 1 year, 4 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  New smoothie drinks coming to Dallas-area Starbucks on Tuesday July 15

  ..."steeped in Italian heritage,"...

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Best Bites: Dining out in Dallas-Fort Worth July 11

  Oh sure, you just had to mention Cafe Brazil again.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Nodding Dog coffeehouse in Dallas' Bishop Arts district appears to have shut down

  Gracias.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Nodding Dog coffeehouse in Dallas' Bishop Arts district appears to have shut down

  OK, OK. But I warn you this is one of the most horrifying coffee stories you’ll ever read.

  On a weekend morning about two weeks ago, I woke to the realization that I had no coffee in the house. This immediately soured my mood, but consciousness generally does that anyway.
  

  No prob, I thought, I’ll just walk to my locally owned coffee hut, Café Brazil, two blocks away on Greenville Ave. I didn’t care about my previous experiences with their weak, stale coffee and styrofoam to-go cups, this was an emergency—and I sure as F wasn’t going to haul my ass all the way to sbux.
  

  I swallowed my low expectations, grabbed the dog and the keys and headed out. Once inside, I saw the place was full-ish. Not packed, because it never is, but there were far more tables occupied than the two or three on any given weekday. A good sign, I hoped, because the coffee would at least be plentiful and fresh since that’s what the breakfast-eaters demand most.
  

  Up at the self-serve coffee bar, I eyed the line of thermal pump carafes, which are stacked two rows deep, a primary spigot in front and one in reserve. I grabbed a foam cup (I can’t find my re-usable at home, so don’t even comment) and tapped the first unflavored pot: Nothing but sputters and air.
  

  Not good. I looked for somebody to change out the pot with the reserve. The cute, always black-clad and tattooed waitresses all seemed to be hustling tables, so I asked the guy standing directly behind the coffee bar if he could help me out. He was wearing a white, but really more gray and multi-stained, T-shirt that proclaimed, “Café Brazil. Not Just Another Coffeehouse.” So my choice seemed reasonable.
  

  “Hey, this one’s empty,” I pointed out to him.
  

  He thought for a minute (or at least I think he was thinking) and said, “Huh. Try the one behind it.” He pointed to the reserve.

  OK. I can switch out a pot for myself. I used to work in restaurants, so I’m familiar with that kind of process. I put down the cup, grab one pot and put it behind the other where it’s no longer a reserve. I didn’t think they’d let me into the kitchen.

  Take two: I pump the new pot. And what streams out looks like pee. Not just ordinary pee, but the kind from a well-hydrated individual. On the plus side there’s steam, so the stuff appears to be hot.

  Reluctantly I look to the guy in the T-Shirt who’s still standing there. “Dude, this stuff is pretty weak. Look, it’s yellow.”
  

  “It’s probably the machine,” he says, stupefyingly. “There’s nothing I can do about that.” He rubs his chest with a meaty hand and just stares at me.

  I don’t really want to expend the effort to get into it with him about how anti-customer service his answer is. I’m kind of grateful he’s not picking his nose in front of me. So I ask if there’s another unflavored pot of coffee somewhere.

  He motions to the end of the long row of flavored coffees. I trudge down there, past a line of people hoping to get a cup of amaretto-walnut—whatever but only receiving the horrible sucking bubbling sounds coming from the pots. It’s a gauntlet of despair.

  At the end of the row, I push past a few people who’re staring ruefully from their empty cups to the unflavored pot. Holding my breath, hoping against hope, I press the lever. Gurgle. Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle. Nothing.
  

  I don’t even ask, I just switch out the pots. Not really caring anymore, and thinking I should’ve just walked the mile to sbux, I finally hear the sound of coffee hitting cup. It’s brown. Well, kind of brown. It’s my last option, so maybe my mind’s playing tricks on me.

  Mr. T-shirt wanders down from the other end of the row and asks, “How’s that? Is everything all right?”

  Too bad I already put the lid on the cup. “It’s slightly better than the sh*t that was in the first pot,” I say and walk out. I was frustrated, and I think that’s what made me forget to drop my two bucks in the bin.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Nodding Dog coffeehouse in Dallas' Bishop Arts district appears to have shut down

  Sure. Why don't you go do PR for Cafe Brazil since you like them so much? I've had several cups of coffee at several Cafe Brazils and it's always been uniformly sucky. I give them props for consistency. You don't even want to know about my last time there.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Nodding Dog coffeehouse in Dallas' Bishop Arts district appears to have shut down

  Great. Cafe Brazil's coffee might be even worse than Nodding Dog's.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  DFW now #1 in country for apartment building

  I smell a bust and lower rents soon.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Richardson-based Network of Community Ministries fighting to survive

  Since when does god need publicity? Or satan, for that matter.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas Animal Ordinance draws line between breeders and humane groups

  Headlock!

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  City of Dallas passes animal ordinance, 10-3

  Shocking! The council actually did something right.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas homeowner must clean up SWAT team mess

  Storming a house only increases the likelihood that you'd get shot in the head. Besides, the majority of murderers are caught without destroying anything, which is most likely how this one will be caught.
  

  Concerns and procedures are under review: http://tiny.cc/1ig59

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas homeowner must clean up SWAT team mess

  Yeh, but what's time compared to destroying somebody's house?
  

  Nobody gets to go to BK during a siege, Gwenevere. Not even for chicken fries.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas Animal Ordinance draws line between breeders and humane groups

  Speaking to the council should be restricted to local residents. I thought it was, in fact.
  

  The "animal people" are no more crazy than anybody who's really into football, restaurants, civil rights, etc. They're usually out there advocating for stuff that the rest of us don't have time for or don't understand, so I'm all for them.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas homeowner must clean up SWAT team mess

  You can't stay in there forever, Lancelot.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas homeowner must clean up SWAT team mess

  Seems more reasonable to just hang around and wait for the guy to come out. Probably costs the same as a deploying a whole SWAT unit and its associated teargas consumption. Also leaves fewer holes in the wall.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas Animal Ordinance draws line between breeders and humane groups

  The number of out-of-town people speaking against this ordinance is out of control.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas chef Gilbert Garza defends wife, Next Food Network Star contestant Lisa Garza

  Next up: Why doesn't your wife like to be called "Mommy."

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas chef Gilbert Garza defends wife, Next Food Network Star contestant Lisa Garza

  Find a lady who likes to "slay the dragon" and you're all set.

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Dallas chef Gilbert Garza defends wife, Next Food Network Star contestant Lisa Garza

  "Impale" them on their "swords."

• 1 year, 5 months ago
  twisteddog's comment on:

  Cycling group Bike DFW launches petition to raise awareness of bicyclists in Dallas

  P.M. Summer's quote is amazingly stupid. He should have just said, "I don't know what you're talking about, and I don't care."

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